I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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