whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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