My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
