I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
try to milk me bitch
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