And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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