Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
