So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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