Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
