come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize