I hate your face
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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