You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
