seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
