her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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