FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Drake has all the answers
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
