So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Randomize
