are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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