almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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