kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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