Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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