you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
