that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
the raccoons are back...
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