moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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