Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
