I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
