Got a toothbrush?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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