Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
