the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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