some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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