Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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