the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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