I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
