the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
