I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize