is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
