I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
