I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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