i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
