Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
vagina is talking i cant
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
