one might say we're banned from that church
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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