he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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