dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
