Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize