Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
