You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
