I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
