I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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