sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
