I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
