I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
