I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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