come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize