she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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